The Wailing List – Do it Yourself Parodies
Do-It-Yourself Motivator Parodies
Your Photos. Your Quotes. Your Chance to Prove Just How Good We Are At This.
For over two decades, the motivation industry has inflicted untold suffering upon the workplaces, schools and civil institutions of the world- in the insidious form of the motivational poster.
By the millions they have been sold and displayed- these dark instruments of corporate, educational and bureaucratic propaganda. They exhort us to work harder, saying nothing of the dangers. They praise the power of teamwork, as the social contract between companies and employees disintegrates. They promise us that dreams can come true, but forget that nightmares are dreams, too.
In 1998, Despair, Inc. dared to fight back- using products reverse-engineered from the most powerful motivational posters ever inflicted upon mankind. And now, with the Parody Motivator Generator, we place those very same tools in YOUR less-capable hands.
Start building your own parodies right now at diy.despair.com!
custom.despair.com
Introducing The Demotivators 2007
Build-Your-Own-Calendar
After countless hours of research and toil, Despair Inc. is proud to present the first calendar ever to be co-authored by our very own customers. Our amazing foray into the print-on-demand universe allows you to control almost every aspect of your Demotivators® 2007 calendar. Not only can you choose which of our over 80 designs you wish to feature during a given month, you can also add your very own personal or humorous calendar dates, for as little as $0.20 per entry!
If you missed out on our Blackout sale, don’t worry. You’ve still got a chance to order our revolutionary new fully-customizable 16 month calendar for the Blackout sale price of $19.95. Simply use the following coupon code: “iamsolameformissingtheblackout” (no quotes) and you’ll be get 13% off the current sale price of $22.95.
In Response to Inevitable Questions
Though I am not a customer service employee, I have at least a modicum of sympathy for many of them (with the exception of Derek, Francesca, and that goth chick they just hired). And – given my penetrating insight into the minds of a good number of you who subscribe to the Wailing List, I will venture to guess that this particular promotion is bound to prompt several obvious questions which I already have answers to.
1) Now that I can create my own motivator parodies, can I have Despair turn them into notecards, calendars or other products for me? – Not yet. But engineering is working on that one… So never say never.
2) Why the cover change for the 2007 Calendar? – Orders placed during the Blackout have a Limited-Edition cover that will not be available to the public, or indeed again.
3) I ordered a calendar during the Blackout, and I saw the note about delayed shipping. When will it ship? – They are beginning to ship this week.
4) This particular Wailing List is really not very funny. Why not? – I can’t always bring the funny- I sometimes just gotta get the news out.
5) Even when your emails aren’t very funny, I still like to get them. I think it’s because I sense beneath the flip, ever-ironic exterior there lurks a rough sincerity that I just never seem to experience from other companies that are trying to market to me- a kind of visceral honesty, and sometimes even a hint of genuine hopefulness. Will you be my friend? – No.
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Despair, Inc. | 103 e. 5th street – suite 200 | austin, tx | 78701